I love a good bargain, don’t you? Recently, I picked up a diffuser at a car boot sale for just £3. Total steal! I got it home, set it up, and, for the first use, it worked like a charm. I was thrilled—my room smelt great, and I felt like I had scored big. But then, the second time I tried to use it, the diffuser kept cutting out and wouldn't turn on properly. Cue frustration!
My immediate reaction? Blame. I started spinning this whole story in my head about how someone at the car boot sale had knowingly sold me a broken diffuser. The nerve! I was ready to write a blog post preaching about being a person who always chooses to do the right thing, to be the light in a world full of darkness. Oh yes, I was ready to go all in on the idea that I am morally superior because I would never sell a broken item to someone. I had myself on quite the pedestal, let me tell you.
And then it happened—a sudden jolt inside me that whispered, "Hold on, Colleen, are you sure you're not the one who's wrong here?" So, I went to check the diffuser again, and sure enough, it turns out there wasn’t enough water in it. The diffuser wasn’t broken; it was just running its natural cycle and shutting off because it didn't have enough water. The fault was all mine.
Talk about a humbling experience! It felt like the Universe was sending me a message to check myself before I spiral into judgement. This little episode was a powerful reminder to me that before I set off into a fixed mindset about any situation, it's worth pausing to consider whether I've got all the facts right.
Why Challenging Ourselves Matters
This experience got me thinking about how important it is for us to continually challenge ourselves and our assumptions. We all want to be good, decent people who do the right thing. But if we don't balance this desire with a healthy dose of self-reflection, we risk letting our ego take over. And trust me, ego loves to find fault with others while blinding us to our own shortcomings.
Self-checking isn't about falling into a pit of self-doubt or constantly second-guessing ourselves. It’s about staying flexible and keeping an open mind. When we incorporate self-checking into our daily habits, we stay grounded. It helps us avoid knee-jerk reactions and keeps us from becoming judgemental or close-minded.
The Pitfalls of a Fixed Mindset
Having a fixed mindset can make us rigid and set in our ways, which isn't helpful if we're trying to be decent, understanding people. If I had stuck with my initial judgement—that the seller was a deceitful person—I'd have missed out on an important lesson about myself and how I react to situations. Worse, I'd have spread negativity instead of understanding.
Instead, by questioning my assumptions and realising my mistake, I avoided judging someone unfairly. It’s a small, but meaningful, shift that makes a big difference in how we interact with the world.
Embrace Self-Checking
So, here’s my takeaway: If we can balance our desire to be decent and do what we think is right with a healthy level of self-checking, then we can avoid the pitfalls our ego sets for us. We can stay grounded, avoid falling into judgement, and remain open to learning.
Let’s all make a pact to question ourselves every now and then. Let’s commit to checking our assumptions and challenging our first reactions. Not only will this help us grow, but it will also make us kinder and more understanding individuals. And isn't that what we need more of in the world?
In the end, it’s not about being perfect; it’s about striving to be better. And sometimes, all it takes is a little water in the diffuser to remind us of that.
Sending so much love out there to you always
C
xx
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